Sunday, March 23, 2014

Monster Socks are a tug at my heart.

Monster socks are one of the coolest things you can possibly imagine as a 4 year old.  I already know my days are numbered until these these fun little socks will no longer be "cool". 

Soon, I'll be the mom who tries too hard to be relevant, to an aging generation that thinks I'm lame.

But this Christmas Leo oooh'd and ahhh'd over these socks from Target.  He loved them like a prize.

At age 4... I was still "cool" enough and  oooh and ahhh right along with him. He still asks for them straight out of the dryer, and he wears them around with pride. 

But I know my days are numbered.  I know soon he will trade in his favorite monster socks for name brand sneakers and plain white socks, and ditch my approval faster than my heart is willing to seal the deal...

Oh those sweet little sleeping feet above!  Sprawled out on the couch without a care! My hope for you while my heart aches, is that the path that you travel,  be as light as your cares!

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Rose colored glasses... and lure to judge other based on social media

I liked a lot of people a whole let better before I knew the guts they had about 'em. Social media has become the litmus test for likability and disdain in recent days.

And, even if you think you know me, you don't: 

You might know about me, but we don't know each other at all. 

We hardly reach out to each other anymore.  The house phone barely rings except for strangers, and the mailbox is empty except for bills.  Without this venue... I'm just a mom, making beds and combing hair in the morning.  I'm just like all moms were before me, doing what all mom's ought to do. 

I live inside your screen, but I'm breathing deep outside it.

You don't feel my pulse... you're just reading my vital signs.  The truth is that you'd only know me if you put your head to my heart and listened close.

Not good new for me, since we all know I'm quite the "gut spiller" and  I've already  been judged, jury'ed, and sentenced a million times since Facebook was born... based solely on my status updates.

So if that's all you think of me, and all you want to know, then you probably see a narcissistic judgmental jerk that only sees the world through rose colored glasses.  Which means that you are looking through them too.

There's a lot of in between either not,  or under reported, in the time and space continuum.  I just happen to be one of those who's biography contains more details than most.

I'm not worried too much about it all though, because if you know me... you know that I'm more than can be feasted on in a minute of social media.  And so are you!

Let's talk!  Agree or disagree?  Message me... let's have a REAL conversation!

Life in "real time"

Our neighbor Sam is a constant around here.  A knock a the door, a forgotten  pair of shoes in the back yard, a garment of clothing left behind from a sleepover... a consistent reminder that she's also one of Nathalie's best friends. 

We live in a area where so many of the kids friends are within walking or bike riding distance from each other.  In this case... we are separated by a single house :o)

PLEASE, don't let the cat out of the bag... but Leo has a MAJOR crush on her.  Eliza has stars in her eyes for her too... she looks up to her and seeks her attention.  Whenever Sam or Annie come over, I never have to wonder where the littles are, because they are usually under foot wherever they are!

Always in either Nathalie's room, or in the basement with Mark and his "big kid" friends, you can usually find Eliza or Leo.. inches behind the crowd.  And sometimes on top of them!

Today was no exception, and since Nathalie and Eliza share a room, it was girl time.  Nail painting, hanging out, and quite possibly a little gossip.  Eliza totally crashed their party:

This is my favorite type of photography....

Lifestyle photography is an "in the moment" type of photo that captures genuine emotion and interaction.  It's YOU as others see you! I sneaked into her room today to grab these really quick as practice.  I wish I had photos like these with my friends from when I was younger. 

My kids might be sick of them, but someday they are going to make for ONE awesome wedding video montage, lol!

Saturday, February 15, 2014

I stood up one of my lunch dates on Valentine's Day...

My neighbor, and BFF, who carpools with me in the morning, texted me after she dropped off the boys this morning to tell me that both Eric and Jason forgot their Valentine's at home.  I said, no worries... I was meeting them for lunch and would bring them then.  (even though she offered to come pick them up for me so I didn't have to take the little ones out in the cold (so sweet! XOXO))  The school's number showed up on the caller i.d. a few minutes later when Eric called me to ask me to bring them when we came for lunch, and I told him the same thing I had just told Kristin.

Eric and Jason had asked me to have lunch with them at school today for Valentine's Day last night.  At our elementary school you can have lunch with your kids at a separate table during their lunch hour.  Since they have lunch back to back, I can never remember who's is first, so I called just to make sure, right after they left for school. 

I thought I heard her say 12:35 and 1:15... but what she really said was 12:35 and 11:15.  Maybe because I think chronologically, and since the second time was actually earlier than the first, my brain kind of self sorted it to time that made more sense.

I even asked twice, cause it kind of didn't sound right, but calling an elementary school office as the students entered the school during attendance was a bad judgement call on my part.  She probably didn't hear me correctly either when I said it back to her.

I called Tony to tell him what time to meet us at school for lunch and he said, "Are you sure?  I thought Jason's lunch was before Eric's?"  I assured him that I had asked twice, so he agreed to meet me us at 12:35.

I ran up to the shower at 11:10, and the phone started ringing a few minutes later.  I couldn't get to it because I was sopping wet so the answering machine went off.  Then seconds later my cell phone started ringing... which is usually an indication that Tony is trying to reach me.  I asked Leo to get me my phone, but I saw the number on my cell phone and saw that was identical to the one Eric had called me from earlier.  Little did I know that Leo had also left or home phone off the hook...

I was certain that it was Jason this time telling me that he had forgotten his as well, and I didn't get a voice mail, but just for good measure I hit redial to check.  I got a message that said the number I was trying to reach was busy. I figured it wasn't a big deal or they would have left a voice mail. 

Or so I thought...

I ran up to McDonald's and got our lunch and a few milk shakes as a treat... and when I walked in my heart sank.  The secretary told me that she had tried to reach me because Jason had told everyone I was bringing his lunch and coming to sit with him.  She even left me a voice mail. 

It turns out I was a no-show!  Oh my broken heart!

My mind immediately cued to sad visions of a very disappointed face that had counted on me to keep my promise.

The secretary assured me that she had left a voice mail on my cell number, but I never got it.  I have an iPhone, but it's been acting strange for the last 48 hours.  Dropped calls, unreliable internet service, (thanks to a Sprint update on Tuesday and Wednesday)  but I knew she was telling me the truth, because I have missed voice mails in the past.  I should have trusted my gut and called the main number to the office instead of hitting redial, because it just didn't feel right. 

I couldn't believe we missed it... and to think of him waiting there for us to spend Valentines Day with him, and never showing up felt like a thousand bee stings on my heart!

It was a comedy of errors.  Except it wasn't funny at all.  "Motherly guilt" is the worst kind of guilt, and it chew a hole in your soul faster than moths in a closet full of cotton.

Within seconds Mr. Sorg, our principal, said, "why don't you call Jason down to the office for a little while.  Let him sit with his family in the lunch room and have lunch with his big brother and family".  I was beside myself.  I wasn't expecting it all.  He had already given a hot lunch during his own lunch period, but even if he didn't take another bite of the lunch I brought for him, I just had to make it up to him and explain what had happened.  I knew he'd be excited by his strawberry milkshake from McDonald's no matter what I had to say. ;o)

Jason lives in the moment, so he didn't stay sad for long. He did say his stomach was VERY full from eating too much, lol.  I appreciated his black and white ways very much at that moment, and prayed really hard that he'd forgive me for standing him up, and keeping him waiting on Valentines Day.

After lunch I ran up to the nearest Sprint store and I complained that I wasn't getting voice mails and how I had been dropping calls, and he told me about an update I didn't know how to do.  ##update# "call.  And just like that, I had  THREE missed voice mails waiting for me in an instant.

Today, just to make sure we were good I asked him, "Were you sad yesterday we weren't there in time for your lunch?" and he said, "NO!  I was mad at you!"  Lol... and I wasn't surprised at all because he always tells me the truth without the sugar on top.

Sometimes people do things for us that they might not ever see as significant... but letting me make it up to my little guy by getting re-do for lunch meant more to me than Mr. Sorg will ever know.  But I'm not surprised... he's pretty awesome like that!

Saturday, February 8, 2014

The 25 year old blanket.

My mom started teaching me to sew when I was about 10.   Oh that darn BOBBIN!  I swear it was nearly the death of me until I got my own sewing machine with a drop in bobbin about 12 years ago!

I still have my mom's sewing machine that my dad bought her for their wedding anniversary decades ago... but I don't think I could ever live without a drop in bobbin ever again!

One of the very first things I ever sewed was a sad little hap-hazard blanket I sewed from scratch when I was 12.  It was awful, and it was SO imperfect...

I'm surprised I kept it at all, except that it fit so comfy under my head between my pillow and my neck.  I felt like Linus all these years because I just couldn't live without it, and when I did, I always woke up with a stiff neck.

Recently the stuffing started falling out.  The guts started shredding, and the middle was falling apart.  In the last few weeks of praying it held together through "one more wash", I knew we were at our end of days.

This dumb blanket means a lot to me.  Not because it was masterfully sewn together, or because it was a gift from a talented friend... it means a lot to me because I remember the day I made it.

I spread all of my sewing materials out on the kitchen table while my dad was watching t.v.  I remember him sitting there the whole time I sewed the darn thing.  I remember taking it apart about a thousand times at the seams before I settled on the final finished product.  I remember switching between a straight stitch zigzag stitch all on the same side of the project.  I remember asking my mom a hundred questions before it was done.

The fabric had pastel colored dinosaurs on it, once upon a time.  I have no idea why I picked it! Maybe subconsciously I knew one day I'd have 4 boys?  Lol!

It's been washed so many times over the last 25 years that the only thing of color left is the light blue thread that is desperately holding it together.

I woke up with a stiff neck this morning, and found more stuffing from blanket on the floor next to my bed.  I didn't want to do it, but today I made a comfortable replacement blanket to stuff under my neck.

I made sure I ran it through the washer and dryer this afternoon to "fluff" it up as much as possible before it's maiden voyage. 

The "original" blanket will be carefully packed away... and tonight I will see if "part II" is an adequate replacement.  If not, I might just have to sew a big old case over the original.

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Why Bill Nye's debate with Ken Ham doesn't bother me one bit...

That's a lie, it totally did... but it's what I did with my thoughts that made me want to address the issue with grace instead of anger.

When I was in beauty school a million years ago, one of the first things I was told was to never talk to clients about politics or religion behind the chair.  The same could probably be said about family and friends, and if you're a friend of mine on facebook, you'll know they've both gotten me quite a few eye-rolls over the years. 

Of course, I never let that stop me... and oh the trouble it's caused at times, lol!

So since I'm dying in a sea of snowstorms here with 6 kids "who have nothing to do", and I'm learning to live a new life without my facebook app on my phone, it took me a few days to learn about the big Bill Nye Vs. Ken Ham in a debate about Evolution Vs. Creationism debate...

I stopped myself about a million times from typing out inappropriately long rebuttals to the jokes and comments made by friends who err on the side of science in lieu of something I personally find to be way more important.


I can't make you see it.  I can't make you feel it.  I can't make you believe it... but just because my faith doesn't fit into your box of logic doesn't mean that God does not exist.

faith  (fāth)
1. Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.
2. Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence. 
3. Loyalty to a person or thing; allegiance: keeping faith with one's supporters.
4. often Faith Christianity The theological virtue defined as secure belief in God and a trusting acceptance of God's will.
5. The body of dogma of a religion: the Muslim faith.
6. A set of principles or beliefs.

You can question my intelligence if it makes you feel better to try to shame me for what I believe, but you will never shake my faith. 

Now if the debate were just about two people, one being wrong and one being right, (Bill Nye and Ken Ham) and you want to take up every discrepancy in the Bible and every flaw of science you automatically lose me in that fight, and honestly, I had no interest in watching it because I already know where I stand.  I watched a clip of Bill Nye's segment and I can't say for sure whether or not I agree with Ken Ham's stand on the issue, but I do know mine.

I believe in God, and it does not rest on logical proof or material evidence... and it also doesn't make me unintelligent, uneducated, or uninformed. 

I believe in God and the Bible, but even that's a messy stand to take among my Christian friends and our different sects of religion.  It's polarizing and contradictory at times even in their own denominations of Christianity.  Divorce, gay marriage, abortion, tithing, social welfare; there are so many polarizing issues dividing all of us of faith today. Honestly, it's also polarizing among my Muslim and Jewish friends of faith.

I'm happy to illogically believe what science can not prove.  I have a confident belief in the truth, value, and trustworthiness of God.

I'm raising my children in the faith I questioned, the faith I tested, and the faith I trust is best for them.

So Bill Nye can tell me all the reasons he believes what he believes based on scientific observation, because he can't stop my heart from knowing what it feels like to filled with the Holy Spirit. He can be the science guy who tells my kids how the earth turns, and how DNA works... but he will never be the person to tell them why.

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Saturday night fun at my sisters house

My younger sister invited our crazy family to her house tonight for dinner and games, along with my older sister's family, and my Mom and her boyfriend, Frank.

Unless it's a holiday, we have come to terms that dinner usually means a smorgasbord of appetizers and snack foods.  I tried to keep it healthy since I'm on 10th round of Weight Watchers (the only thing that has ever worked for me!) combined with another 90 fitness program called Bikini Body Mommies. I've done really good, and I feel great.  I have a 20 year high school reunion coming up this year, and 6 kids is no excuse for letting myself go!  I'm just about 15 pounds from my weight the day I got my license when I turned 16, and I'm not going to let those 15lbs win!

After dinner we played a few board games, but when my sister announced that we were playing "hide and go seek in the dark", I was ALL in!  We used to do this when we were little and it was SO much fun.  We still play it at home with our own kids, but playing it with my sister again was priceless!

My brother in laws both got me really good by blending in with the corners of the wall!  Then Leo and I hid in my sisters bed with the covers over our heads and we were almost the last to be found, except that Eric was quietly hiding out under the kitchen table unnoticed until he came out on his own!

We also played a game that Shelly and Mike created called Ga-ga-ga-ga-GRINCH!  It's when the person who's holding the stuffed Grinch doll says "ga-ga-ga-ga-GRINCH" and then throws it at the head of the most unsuspecting person in the room.  Shelly is a nut.

The family pyramid was also one of my favorite things tonight!

I'm so glad that tonight's snow didn't keep us from our plans tonight... even thought it took us twice as long to get there.  So glad I have such a crazy, fun, and nutty family to share a Saturday night with!

It was good to laugh and spend time with my family tonight.  Thanks for putting up with all of us for the night Shell-Shell!